Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize