Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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