I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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