So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
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