Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Randomize