im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
please come you make the beer taste better
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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