I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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