I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
