it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
