are you still at the devil's house?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
