Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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