With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize