i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize