Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
