HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
