Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
