I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
