Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Hippo gnu deer
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
