doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
