So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Welp...herpes.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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