just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
