this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
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