big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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