Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
