Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
