You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
she told me i tasted like america
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
