just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Less talking, more tequila
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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