i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
