You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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