If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
ttyl tear gas
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
