Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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