What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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