I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
