where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Having a random hookup so left but love u
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
