I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
foreskin is a definite game changer
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
