420 ftw
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
