Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
