member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
