She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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