So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Randomize
