No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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