Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
