I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
