i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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