so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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