You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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