so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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