I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
we made out on top of his cat.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
