I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
