This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
