It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
