my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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