Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
i think my cat just said my name.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
