My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize