Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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